You know what is a little strange? When people say “global warming” every time there is an unseasonably warm day. I’m no global warming naysayer, but are they crazy? Do they think it’s that simple? When it’s cold and rainy like it’s supposed to be in winter, does that mean there’s no such thing as global warming? I’m pretty sure I just committed some kind of logical fallacy but come on now.

Let’s move on.

Next time there is an unseasonably warm day, I suggest you do this. Grab your significant other or that friend with whom you are basically living until one of you finds a significant other, and go to Oddfellows. Order two breakfast panini ($8 each, worth it) and two iced americanos and take them on over to Cal Anderson park—I like that grassy knoll near the playground equipment.

The breakfast panino is two ginormous pieces of toasty-but-soft, spongy, buttery bread between which are smashed cheddar, tomato, and bacon and onto which are tossed two fried eggs. It’s a little piggy, but it comes with a green salad, which squares things up nicely. Have a jog around the park if you’re feeling guilty, or listen to your shrink when she says that guilt is an emotion that you choose whether or not to feel. Either way, you’re gonna have a very, very good breakfast.

Go on more cheap dates!

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