Jeff Bezos’s Bulging Forehead Vein
@PrimalAnger: Alexa, that’s not how you pronounce ‘overlord’!
The Line at Salt and Straw
@ForeverCold99: “Genius is patience.” —Isaac Newton
A Sentient Man Bun
@TieOneOn81: God, another night at Unicorn? One more corn dog and PBR selfie and I’m veering this hipster straight into Pike/Pine traffic.
Bill Gates’s Reading List
@MSNightstand: ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck’ is a deeply inspiring examination of mankind’s struggle to accept our true selves.
Sasquatch (Not the Festival)
@YesMeReal: Me still undecided on whole man bun trend.
A Bot That Retweets Any Mention of Dick’s Burgers
@DickPicks RT @PrimalAnger: I could have had an aquarium, five shake weights, and a case of ketchup delivered to my house in the time it took to get this #[email protected]% Deluxe with fries.