I am thinking about getting out of a long term relationship with my current political party and I am ready to start anew with a hot and truly dominant political party.

Please no smokers.

I know it's against protocol to talk about your past relationships while seeking new ones, but it might help my suitors to know what I need.  Although, there's been some titillation in our relationship lately (yay Sotomayor appointment, yay O-speech in Cairo) I'm starting to think that it's just time we broke up.  See, it's not that we don't get along or we don't see eye-to-eye (although get your shit together on Don't Ask/Don't Tell).  We do on most things (yay on health care reform).  Plus, I am really flexible and patient.

Maybe I am patient to a fault. I am so patient that I have been waiting over three years for things to improve between us.  It's just, I want my dominant political party to be in charge. So, take charge.  If I give you permission to be a dominant political party, be fucking dominant!

I like long walks on the beach and cuddling on the couch too.

One of the things I also enjoy, future suitors, is role play. This is your opportunity, dominant political party, to show me who's boss.  You're going to shove that big public option down my throat, aren't you? Do it!

Well, there is nothing more, um, deflating than seeing, what is supposed to be, a political party in charge - wearing leather chaps and getting ready to dominate - when that look comes across their face of "Oh shit, what do I do next'?

I get it.  You're not used to being in charge and you don't know what to do. Well, it could be time for you to put down the riding crop and climate change dildo and move aside. I need someone that knows how to be in charge.

No druggies, please.

I waited three years for my current political party to get their shit together and assume the role. Now I need someone that understands it on Day 1.

Are you that dominant political party?  If so, please apply.  Unless you're married.  I don't do married men anymore.