Your love is as exciting as the waves that crash on the beach. So for everyone's sake, get out of town.

What's better than conversation hearts and cheaper than jewelry? A Valentine's Day trip over the upcoming weekend that begins on V-Day (like you were gonna work on Friday) and ends on Presidents' Day Monday. Here's where to go based on your relationship status.

• Just Hooked Up
Still don't know your sorta-significant other's middle name? Time to hole up on the Oregon Coast during stormwatching season. You can hardly leave the hotel room and figure out if you can truly stand this person's road trip music choices.

• Dating For Awhile
You don't want to turn the holiday into a anxiety-ridden coded conversation about getting engaged (or not), so drown out loaded chatter by snowmobiling in Roslyn. The snowcapped mountain views will stun you both into silence, then later you can dine at the Old No. 3 bar, where baseball caps and fried fare will effectively table the diamond-ring issue for another year.

She loves me like a rock (you hope).

• Married Recently
Great wedding, guys—you really pulled out all the stops. And that honeymoon in Thailand sounded amazing! But maybe dial it back for V-Day with a two-day road trip through the rocky wonders of Central Washington. The landscape will give you opportunity to ponder the expanse of geologic time, and just how long you've committed to this person.

• Constantly Fighting
Hey there, Bickersons. What are you yelling about today? Who didn't take out the trash? Who didn't stop sleeping with the mailman? We can't guarantee a detente, but you can take the argument international in Victoria, BC, where you'll be shamed into acting civil over afternoon tea. (Or be inspired by the city's famous architect, murdered by his wife's teenage lover. Watch out, mailman!)

• Been Together Forever
Congratulations on your long, enduring, successful relationship. Anyone who survives decades of togetherness deserves a little sunshine. May we suggest the warm streets of Palm Springs? There's a touch of Seattle in the funky Ace Hotel Palm Springs (but be sure to ask for a non-party room) and a glorious view from the top of the Palm Springs Ariel Tramway. You can pass the time reminiscing as you stroll past Frank Sinatra's house and go vintage thrift shopping. Those were the good ol' days, am I right?

• Single and Over It
Yeah, Valentine's Day is dumb. Eff the romance and take to the skies on a float plane trip. Forget finding your "life co-pilot" (gag)—you can sit next to the pilot and get the best view of the Pacific Northwest. Simply take a high-flying round-trip jaunt, or stop for the day in San Juan Island to play.

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