Hot Take
Book Clubbers
In honor of the Rat City Rollergirls and Seattle Arts and Lectures, we've built an all-star roller derby team of female authors.
Image: Wikimedia Commons and Sara Marie D’Eugenio
January packs a potent combo of brain and brawn. The badass women of Rat City Rollergirls dish out body blows and high-energy entertainment every time they hit the track, and you can catch the action during the season opening bouts on January 14. But if after watching the battle, your mind craves a more soothing diversion, curl up in Sorrento Hotel’s Fireside Room for Seattle Arts and Lecture’s Local Voices readings on January 18. In honor of both events, we dreamt up the ultimate roller derby team of female authors.
Team Name
Virginia Woolf Pack
Roster
-
Pain Austen
Low blows and high society. -
J. K. Brawling
And you thought the hallows were deathly… -
Toni Gore-ison
Beloved, but no love lost. -
Harpooner Lee
Killed so many mockingbirds. -
Judy Doom
Are you there, God? It’s me, blowing by you on the rink. -
Cheryl Flayed
The pain from walking the Pacific Crest Trail can’t compare to her elbows. -
Maria Disassemple
A: Bernadette was fleeing Maria’s game-day stare. -
Alice “You’re Gonna Needa” Walker
The color purple is an apt name for the bruises she inflicts. -
Agony Christie
The only twist here is her twisting your arm. -
Betray Me Tan
Any joy or luck your club had will run out.
Alternates
- Edna St. Vincent Will-Slay
- Sylvia "Blood" Plath
- Stephanie Terrif-meyer
- Gillian Grimm
- Joan "Broken Bone" Didion
- Scary Roach
- "Human Target" Marget Atwood
- Malice Munro
- Ayn Ran-dom Acts of Violence
