MY QUARTERBACK'S BACK AND YOU'RE GONNA BE IN TROUBLE

While football fans look forward to the opening of training camp, it's rarely a legitimate reason for celebration. The Seahawks didn't get the memo, and gave the 12th Man a huge reason to cheer on Friday when the team signed star quarterback Russell Wilson to a 4-year, $87.6 million contract (with a whopping $60 million guaranteed, one of the highest totals in league history).  It was a busy week for the defending NFC Champions, as the club also gave a 4-year contract extension to All-Pro middle linebacker Bobby Wagner, and had to cut starting defensive tackle Tony McDaniel (because apparently the NFL salary cap is a real thing).

While there was a bit of nervousness among fans before Wilson inked the new deal, let's be honest, did anyone really think he'd leave Seattle? Even if they hadn't worked out a deal before the season, does he really seem like the type of guy who would vengefully head to another team next off-season because the Seahawks wouldn't pay him early? Really? Regardless, you've got your quarterback, Seattle. Now if only he'd stop publicly treating his girlfriend like a helpless creature whose sexuality he needs to control for her own good.

GET WEIRD-O

The sounds of summer keep getting sweeter. Seattle's premier surf rock band—La Luz—returns this Friday (June 7) with its second LP, Weirdo Shrine. But there's no need to wait until release day to hear the warm buzz (and dark undercurrents) of the new tunes, as the Ty Segall-produced album can currently be streamed in its entirety over at NPR (or via the embedded player below).

To mark the arrival Weirdo Shrine, La Luz heads to the Showbox on Friday for a release show. In order to make it a party everyone can attend, the band has made tickets available for only $5. To put that in very real terms, La Luz basically is willing to (likely) lose money on the concert (the Showbox ain't cheap) in order to get you to go. The ladies have even been traveling around town to sell the tickets themselves. Don't miss out on joining the bash and being part of La Luz's dance river (you'll understand when you get there).

ON HIS MARK

Let's be honest, if Mark Hamill wanted to be a little bitter, no one could really hold it against him. Even if you get to play an iconic character like Luke Skywalker, no actor wants to be entirely defined by one role. After all, Harrison Ford got to be more than Han Solo, but Hamill will forever just be Luke (though he's had a great career as a voice over artist, most notably being superb as the Joker in Batman animated series and video games). But Imgur user raggedrabbit's collection of Star Wars cards autographed by Hamill suggests that the actor retains a good sense of humor his famed role. Each card features a humorous note that wryly mocks the moment depicted in the image. From good-natured criticisms of George Lucas's scripts to oblivious comments on Darth Vader's fatherhood, each one's a gem.

PLEASE LET US GO BACK TO SCHOOL

Dynasty mode in EA's NCAA Football series was the greatest mode to ever grace the medium of sport video games. It gave the user full control of a college football team, all the way down to recruiting pitches for fake high school players. (True story: One time when playing, I recruited a defensive end who was 0'7". My friends and I assumed it was a glitch and he'd show up as either 5'7" or 6'7". Nope. He was a quaterback-terrifying force barely visible to the naked eye. It was amazing and led to greatest instant replays in gaming history.) EA stopped making new editions of the game in 2013 for fear of having to pay college athletes to use their likenesses (while the game never featured actual names, the rosters were filled with accurate unnamed counterparts to real players), and it left a whole in a lot of gamers' hearts. Needless to say, Andrew Sharp's impassioned plea for the game's return strikes a chord for any devotee to the dormant franchise.

PHANTOM POWER

After former Mariner great Randy Johnson entered the Hall of Fame two weekends ago, the M's official Twitter account turned its gaze to next year's celebration in Cooperstown, which will undoubtedly feature Ken Griffey Jr.'s induction. And while the tweet's message was on point, the photo choice was... well...

imagine what he could've done with a baseball bat https://t.co/z1FpG3IZNE

— Jeff Sullivan (@based_ball) July 27, 2015