Today's delightful crime fail comes courtesy of Officer Thomas Jelcick:

On Thursday, June 10th, 2010 at about 0905 hours, [the victim] was returning home [in the 700 block of 22nd  Ave E].

As [she] walked up onto her front porch a black male, maybe 33 years of age, nicely dressed with a muscular build approached her from the sidewalk.

The suspect asked if she had any gardening work to hire out and she replied no, the house was owned and maintained by the school across the street.

As told the suspect this, she pointed with her right hand/arm. The suspect immediately grabbed purse from her raised arm and ran off southbound in the 700 block of 22nd Avenue East.

[The victim] was not injured, just startled. Interestingly enough, the 'purse' was a four-dollar purchase from a thrift store, and it was filled with plastic doggy bags (poop-bags), and a few dog treats - nothing of value. An area search for the suspect was negative.

It's unclear from the report whether there was actually any poop in the purse, but godddddddddddd do I ever hope there was.