Hey there Josh "BikeNerd" Cohen, if you were a true bike nerd you'd be riding one of these:
No, that's not mine. But since you asked, my favorite ride has fat black tubing, yellow tires, and a Y2K-vintage Panic Now sticker:
Got her used for $125 five years ago and she's carried me from the bottom to the top of Pike Street more than one thousand times. Nothing nerdy about her and as nimble as a chickadee. So fine and fast it's risky to leave her unrestrained for even the time it took to shoot that photo.
Okay, bout of bike nerd envy all finished now. Carry on.