Tyrone, buddy, is something wrong?

Did we piss you off?  Did we do something to irk you?

Was it my speculation that your own goal on Wednesday was anything other than accidental?  (From TV, repeated over and over, it had all the composure and flair of Zidane's two in France's 98 WC final victory over Brazil. It was beautiful, just into our goal, not theirs.)

Now this?

Let me be clear: You and Hurtado are, after Ljungberg and Keller, our two strongest and most important players. Without you, we're spineless. Even missing just one of you, our record drops notably (I'm not nerdy enough to crunch the numbers, but I'll guess we're 1-3-6 in those situations).

But I'm starting to get a little concerned.

A week ago, I said our two greatest liabilities were Fredy Montero and defender #4.  Depending on who you talk to, Montero appears to have gotten the hint, woken up, matured, "gotten over it," or grown conscious of looming trade windows. His big goal on Saturday against New York—stealing it from a defender, and rocketing it in at an awkward angle to save us from embarrassment for the final 1-1 tie with the lowly Red Bulls—was everything we've wanted to see from him for the last two months, not to mention the two shots that bounced off the woodwork.  Consider that liability settled.

Our defense, on the other hand: I was never completely sold on Wahl or Ianni—they both work hard, but are unreliable. Do I have to start worrying about Marshall now too? Less than three days after Marshall's beautiful score for D.C., he gets a slippery ball on a soaked field, missteps on the clear, plowing  it right into Ianni ten feet away, which bounces off and lands at the feet of and unmarked Juan Palbo Angel who has nothing but space, time, and Keller between him and the goal. It was one of those sequences that happens in a pee-wee league of six year olds, except it happened to us.

So I ask: What the fuck?!? Twice in a row?  Is it Hurtado's absence? Was Ianni out of position? Is there a jinx on our D? Or just wet weather and a shitty surface? What do we have to do?  First it was red cards, now injuries and slapstick soccer.