For the Literary Lover
As anyone that has leafed through their grandparents' mailed correspondences knows, letter writing is a lost art. In the hands of master wordsmiths, letters encapsulate a relationship in beautiful, moving prose. Such was the case with the correspondence between the lauded 20th-century American poets Elizabeth Bishop and Robert Lowell. Their 30-year friendship via postman—including their personal highs and lows and mutual admiration—comes to life on stage in Dear Elizabeth. Seattle Repertory Theatre, $37–$52.
For the the Romantic Ticket Scalper
Expect more hymns than sermons when Irish musician Hozier—of the hit single “Take Me to Church”— comes to town. The congregation should be packed; most of the shows on the tour supporting his self-titled debut LP have sold out. Luckily this one’s on a Saturday night, so the following morning you can say a few Hail Marys and attempt to atone for your earthly sins. Unfortunately, the show is sold out. Prove that you'll do anything for love—including paying ridiculously marked up prices—by snagging seats on the secondary market. Paramount Theatre, sold out.
For the Secret Fanfiction Writer
Slash: Burlesque Romance Without Boundaries
Seattle's top nerdlesque performers take speed dating to the next level in an over-the-top burlesque performance inspired by the indie card game Slash: Romance Without Boundaries. With pop culture characters as a starting point and alternative love in all of its many forms as the end result, this performance is far from your average striptease show. Re-Bar, $20–$40.
For the Comedic Canoodler
Comedian Greg Behrendt’s career took an unexpected turn into the realm of relationship advisor and TV host when his book He’s Just Not That Into You (coauthored with Liz Tuccillo) became a smash success. But the career shift left him with a deep depression and substance abuse issues. After sorting out his problems, Beherendt has returned to the standup stage happier, healthier, and as funny as ever. So please, don't ask him to diagnose your relationship issues. Just laugh. Tacoma Comedy Club, $20.
For the Culinary Cupid
Seductive's Valentine's Day Cooking Class and Dinner
Epicurious Valentines are served up a lesson in aphrodisiac cuisine by Seductive Specialty Foods chef Traci Post while sipping a signature cocktail in the Atrium Kitchen at Pike Place Market. And that's merely the appetizer. A seven-course meal candlelit dinner in the Goodwin Library follows, and it's heavy with the classics: foie gras, chocolate, and, yes, oysters. Oh la la. Pike Place Market, $135.
For the Smooth Jazz Sweetheart
Mindi Abair Valentine’s Celebration
There’s something undeniably sultry about the saxophone. Its tones bear a mark of breathy passion. If you seek the perfect date soundtrack for Valentine’s Day, look no further than Jazz Alley, where contemporary sax star Mindi Abair heats things up for a special holiday concert. (Since the V-Day performances seem to be sold out, maybe grab tickets for Abair's Thursday, Friday, or Sunday night performances.) Dimitriou's Jazz Alley, sold out.
For the Artistic Admirer
Georgetown Art Attack: Valentine's Day
Georgetown has bloomed in recent years as a hip art haven, and it can't wait to show you its portfolio. Join the hoards perusing the galleries and studios in this month's Art Attack. Bars, restaurants, coffee shops and Fran's Chocolates await your arrival to satiate your sweetheart in between visits to art spaces. There's even a shuttle to chariot tired feet to and from the massive Equinox Studios, a short jaunt from the Airport Way stretch. Georgetown, free.
For the Poetic Paramour
Medicine Ball: Playwrights vs. Poets
This literary boxing match pits practitioners of verse and stagecraft against one another in a no-holds-barred battle over love and sex. Poets and playwrights are placed in teams and given a prompt to write toward, tackling the big issues over Valentine's Day, then an acting company performs each. The audience then votes, and after three days of matches a winner is crowned. West of Lenin, $20.