"I failed my drug test, but they hired me anyway. They hired me because I’m short." —David Sedaris on working as a Macy’s elf, SantaLand Diaries

How fitting that tickets to see our favorite elf, David Sedaris, go on sale soon. The Grammy-winning writer might be the most reliable one-man show out there right now. He delivers like a comedian with perfect timing—and perfect grammar. His last stop in Seattle was timed with the release of his 2008 book, When You Are Engulfed in Flames, so we’re hoping he has some new material for this "Evening with David Sedaris" at Benaroya Hall.

On sale: Tuesday, Dec 15, for a May 9 show at Benaroya. Presented by Northwest Associated Arts (NWAA) and The Stranger.
$38-$47, www.benaroyahall.org

Tickets still available (as of 3pm, Dec 8):

Kathy Griffin
Fri & Sat, Jan 29 & 30, Paramount Theatre.
Best available: $42.50, mezzanine, www.tickets.com

Alice in Chains
Fri, Feb 5, Paramount Theatre.
Best available: $46.50, orchestra, www.tickets.com

Bon Jovi
Fri & Sat, Feb 19 & 20, Key Arena
Best available: $145.48 each for Feb 20 show only, www.ticketmaster.com

U2 360 Tour
Sun, June 20, Qwest Field
Best available: $98.50 general admission, www.ticketmaster.com

On StubHub:

Wilco
Wed, Feb 10, Paramount Theatre.

Cheech and Chong
Thu, Feb 11, Mount Baker Theatre, Bellingham, Wa.

John Mayer w/ Spearhead
Wed, Mar 31, Key Arena.