From the summer/fall 2008 issue of Seattle Met Bride & Groom:

‘We both love our longstanding relationships with our respective psychotherapists. But we’re not really workshop people. Like all couples, we have our issues at times, but we’re not rocky by any means, and we’re both open, positive communicators. Nonetheless, University of Washington-based Drs. John and Julie Gottman are considered the international leaders in progressive couples therapy, so we figured we had something to gain from their workshop — some scientifically organized compendium of tricks and techniques that could serve as a sort of user’s manual for our upcoming marriage.’

In "Work in Progress," the couple who penned this article for us went on to describe the by degrees eye-rolling (healthy skeptics) and aha-momenting (never too in love to learn how to love more) that ensued after they agreed to dedicate a line item in their wedding budget to a weekend workshop put on by the Gottman Institute. I had lunch with the female half of this couple last week. They’re still happily married; fighting the good fight, one day at a time.

You probably know by now that planning a wedding isn’t easy. A year from now you will know that being married isn’t a piece of cake either. Considering the dough you’re dropping on the dress, the dessert buffet, and the seven nights on Maui afterward, it makes good sense to consider investing in some training for the lifetime that follows all of that.

According to the piece we shared with our readers back in ‘08, the experts’ bliss boot camps, ‘make good on the ’science’ part of the workshop’s title when Dr. John describes in riveting detail the physical, chemical, and neurological responses he has observed in more than 3,000 couples at the Family Research Laboratory. A key finding of the Gottmans’ research is that it’s important for couples in conflict to identify the types of problem at hand, and work out a mutually agreeable road map — ahead of time — for dealing with them. ’

The couple also outlines how the workshop dealt with, well … softer sciences: ’We now regularly kiss each other for a full six seconds. It’s John Gottman’s magic number; he says that in that time, the kisser is forced to let other thoughts fade away.’

Interested in learning how to kiss for life? The next Art & Science of Love weekend seminar is February 26 & 27; there are four more opportunities to arm yourselves with relationships tools in 2011. Workshops take place at the Seattle Center; the price is $725 per couple and you may register on the Gottman’s website.