An Inch-By-Inch Guide to Snow in Seattle

1 Inch

Schools close. Roads littered with demolished Priuses.

2 Inches

As a sidewalk safety precaution, even artisanal salt flies off grocery store shelves. 

3 Inches

Euphoria levels disproportionate to girth of snowmen.

4 Inches

Subarctic food culture becomes all the rage; Tom Douglas and Ethan Stowell open dueling lutefisk stands.

5 Inches

Light Rail expansion halted to fund new commuter dog sled routes.

6 Inches

A liberal stronghold no longer believes in global warming.

7 Inches

FEMA stops returning our calls.

Published in the The Ultimate Guide to Winter Fun issue of Seattle Met.