There are currently more than 16,000 Seahawks-themed items on Etsy, and approximately 12,000 of them are infinity scarves. Of the 4,000 remaining homemade articles of clothing, jewelry and assorted tchotchkes, many are legitimately well-done. The others, though, look like they're the result of a concussion-fueled fever dream.
“Snuggy” was taken. So was “slanket.” But who needs a clever portmanteau when you’ll look this good.
OH MY GOD, MOM. YOUR FINGERTIPS EXPLODED!
Maybe it would have been funny if it weren’t for that whole “Ray Rice dragging his unconscious fiancee out of an elevator thing"? Yeah, probably not.
“While supplies last.” Or until you get your ass off the couch and go buy some tissue paper and scissors at Michael’s.
This rainbow tastes like desperation.
Just a hunch, but that 3D printer might need to be recalibrated.
This sounds really familiar … Oh, right.
Marshawn Lynch, patron saint of jock itch sufferers.
This is the “angel” who denies you entry to heaven.
Even Earl’s like, “Girl, nope.”
“Who says beach garland can't also be Seahawks Swag?” Everyone. I mean, literally everyone but you.