Valar dohaeris: High Valyrian for "all men must serve" milkshakes in observance of the biggest television event of the year.

Image: Shake Shack

Dark wings may bring dark words, but we humble scribes aren't dispatching news by raven today. We do, however, bear tidings of the latest food—also dark, in hue at least—to hop on the Game of Thrones trend loot train: the Dragonglass milkshake. And who can blame Shake Shack? We all—except those who outwardly would like anyone within earshot to know that they do not watch one of the globe's most anticipated television series—have been waiting for the HBO show's series finale. Fans have trod to trivia nights and fantastical, blood-splattered brunches. There's special edition Oreos and whiskey—if someone makes an upmarket "bowl of brown" that would be incredible.

Shake Shack, nay Rholītso Rhakion in Valyrian, has bequeathed this shake (about $7) nationwide hereby available from Friday, April 12 until May 19. The limited edition treat (also in limited supply) is "topped with shards of Dragonglass imported from the caves of Dragonstone," per the press release. But fret not, the freshly mined dragonglass is actually black-dyed toffee that shatters, thank the old gods and the new, much easier than the Westerosi obsidian. —Rosin Saez

Still we braved this Blackwater-hued white chocolate mint custard shake:

"It’s a pretty traditional—ahem, unsullied—mint chocolate shake with toffee on top. It did leave a weird coating my mouth, like Oreo filling. More shrug-worthy than Queen of Dragons worthy." —Stefan Milne, arts editor

"Shake Shack should've consulted Hot Pie who knows the secret to any treat is browning the butter first. Alas, the dragonglass melts into the shake to create grayscale-like color in the drink and...on my teeth. But if it brings me closer to the Iron Throne, I'm for it." —RS, associate editor

"Thick and foamy and minty, which is good. Slight milk-of-the-poppy mouthfeel, which is less so. Also, toffee and mint is an interesting combination." —Philip Kiefer, editorial intern

"Though Shake Shack’s minty custard was frozen with 'packed snow harvested beyond the Wall,' as the raven that messengered these shakes back to the Seattle Met fort, they were admittedly a little melty after a 10-minute walk—but no less creamy. Worth facing an ice dragon to procure? Probably not. A manageable line? Aye." —Jaime Archer, digital editor

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