Steve Sarkisian Is a Masochist

But at least the Huskies landed a good quarterback

June 10, 2009

Congratulations, Coach Sark: You landed yourself a successor to Jake Locker and gave Dawg fans a reason to get giddy about the future of the UW football program. I guess it has something to do with your time at USC that you were able to convince a prep star from L.A. — Oaks Christian High School’s junior QB Nick Montana — to turn down scholarship offers from Notre Dame, LSU, Ohio State, and Alabama in favor of a spot at Washington after he graduates next year. And the kid’s stat line from Oaks Christian’s 14-0 season last year — 2,400 yards passing, 33 touchdowns, completed 55 percent of his passes — has to help ease the sting of watching BYU come into your backyard to steal Jake Heaps, Skyline’s press conference–holding, press release–releasing quarterback, last week. So good on you, dude.

Your 2010 recruiting class is already considered one of the best in the country, so you obviously know what you’re doing, and it’s probably safe to assume that you did some research on Montana’s dad, Joe, right? So you’re aware he played for a couple years in the NFL? And apparently he’s just your average high school sports parent: shows up to all of the games, cheers on his son between mouthfuls of popcorn, elbows the head coach out of the way to offer instruction from the bench. You know, the usual stuff.

Uh, Sark, were you listening when Oaks Christian coach Bill Redell made that quip about, "If you’ve been a three-time Super Bowl MVP, you can come out and coach your kid"? Ha ha, right? Wrong. Do you realize what you’ve gotten yourself into? The precedent has been set, and this Joe Montana character — what does he know, anyway? — is going to be a menace, undermining you at every opportunity. But it’s not too late; you can salvage this situation. Just follow Coach Redell’s lead and indulge this over-involved stage parent’s sideline meddling on one condition: That he make a sizeable donation to that Husky Stadium renovation you so badly need.

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