Sauced

Bartenders’ St. Patrick’s Day Horror Stories

A few notable local cocktail folk share past experiences manning the front lines on March 17.

Posted by: Jessie Wesley on Mar 09, 2012 at 10:00AM 0 Comments

How would you like to spend eight hours serving drinks to these guys? Photo via Barnacles Hostels.

There are holidays for giving gifts, giving thanks, holidays for love, and then there is St. Patrick’s Day. For many imbibers, March 17 means incapacitating doses of cheap, green beer, jostling through giant crowds for a poorly poured Guinness at eight in the morning, novelty shots, jumbo-sized shamrocks and shrunken “Kiss Me I’m Irish” t–shirts. For an on-duty bartender, however, March 17 means a nightmare of unmatched proportions.

We asked a few notable bartenders to share their war stories from St. Patrick’s Day shifts of yore.

Vito’s
Justin Gerardy, Bar Manager

One of the main reasons why it’s important to manage the bar that you work in is so you don’t have to work St. Patrick’s Day. It is almost always a bit of a nightmare. I’ve never worked in a bar that produced green beers or even did a special on Irish whiskey for the night, but someone always rolls in and makes an ass of himself (gender carefully chosen). One of the years that I actually had to work it, a guy came in, jacked up on steroids, alcohol, and tiger blood, wearing bead necklaces and a tight green shirt. His buddy ordered Irish car bombs while he took a phone call. I politely informed them that we didn’t do bombs, and I’d need to see some identification before we go much further. Buddy produced an ID, but the ‘roid-monster ignored me until his buddy got his attention. Turns out it had just expired. I told him I couldn’t serve him as a result, and he flipped. He told me to “Come over here and say it to my face!” Then he called me every gay slur in the book and asked my where my bouncer was. The bar just so happened to be occupied by six or eight very wonderful long-term patrons who happened to be gay men. He wasn’t there much longer.

That’s the last time I worked a St. Patty’s Day, and life has been grand ever since.

Vessel (reopening soon)
Jim Romdall, Bartender-Owner

My craziest St. Paddy’s was when I was working at a college bar about 10 years ago. It was a slower night of the week, and we usually didn’t get hit too hard for St. Patrick’s Day since we were off of the main college strip, but we staffed a couple extra people in preparation just in case. We were super slow by 10pm, so I sent everyone home except for myself and a server, not thinking we were going to get crazy. Apparently all the bars on The Ave were so packed that a traveling horde of drunk college students had formed from the overflow. At 11 the horde found me and 150–ish people poured through my door. I vaguely remember throwing empty kegs across the walk-in trying to reach the buried full keg of Guinness, my server crying, and me saying, “order something simpler!” several times when someone wanted something that took more than 10 seconds to make. In the end I had lots of money and a very sticky bar.

Matt’s in the Market
Robbie McGrath, Bartender

Luckily being a 37–year veteran, and Irish I have not worked a St. Patrick’s eve in years. Thank God.

Mulleady’s Pub
Travis Stanley-Jones, Bartender-Owner

We get a huge kick out of customers who specifically want tables facing the front door so they can watch the “riff raff” who have been to two to three other Irish pubs storm in the front door expecting loud music, Jameson girls, and Irish car bombs…it’s as if they hit a glass wall on their second step, they look at their buddies in that buzzed, confused state and bumble away muttering to themselves. I can think of one couple who will re–tell these stories to me when I bartend for the next few months.

Add a Comment »

Tags: Vessel, Travis Stanley-Jones, Jim Romdall, St. Patrick's Day, Robbie McGrath, Mulleadys, Justin Gerardy, Vito's, Matt's in the Market, St. Patrick's Day 2012

Vito’s Revives the Two-Martini Lunch

Lunch is served on first fridays only…ideally with a drink in hand.

Posted by: Allecia Vermillion on Nov 28, 2011 at 12:45PM 0 Comments

The First Hill den of imbibement opens for lunch just one day a month.

Now that Vito’s has resurrected the Tom and Jerry, the First Hill institution is endeavoring to bring back the heady days when our civic power brokers swilled multiple lunchtime martinis before staggering back to the office, presumably to nap.

Vito’s is now open for lunch on the first Friday of each month. The meals are known as the “two-martini lunch,” though you are unlikely to be met with resistance should you stick to one. Or you can slug down three, as long as you’re not driving. That whole nostalgia thing only goes so far.

The lunch menu runs from 11:30 to 3 and includes salads, cannelloni, sauteed clams, a burger, and a grinder. The most expensive thing on the menu, a braised lamb shank, is $15. Perhaps most importantly, vodka and gin martinis will run you $7.

According to bar manager Justin Gerardy, a nephew of original owner Vito Santoro recalls prepping giant vats of chilled, cheap vodka before the lunch rush. With the Hideout ownership now running the 58-year-old restaurant, the martinis are likely crafted with a bit more care than their 1960s counterparts. And in this haven of dry, non-cloying cocktails, Friday lunchers can also jettison the martinis for, say, a Waldorf and Stadler (made with gin, lime, Falernum, Fernet, and muddled cucumber) or a Six Cylinder (a blend of gin, Dubonnet, both sweet and dry vermouth, Cherry Heering, and Campari). Says Gerardy, “Both are light enough to take early on in the day and complex enough to give you something to think about.”

Well what do you know…the next two-martini lunch is happening this Friday. Cancel your afternoon meetings and venture back to the Mad Men-ish days of lunchtime imbibement. Minus the chain smoking, philandering, secretary-ogling, and inebriated pants-wetting, of course.

Add a Comment »

Tags: Lunch, Special Lunches, Drinking Culture, Vito's, Justin Gerardy

Vito’s Resurrects the Tom and Jerry

Sample this hot drink of decades past between Thanksgiving and the new year.

Posted by: Allecia Vermillion on Nov 17, 2011 at 03:00PM 0 Comments

The Tom and Jerry. Photo: Serious Eats

In case you missed the news reports, Twitter talk, elevator chitchat and actual contact with the outdoor air, let me bring you up to speed: It’s cold outside. And we are teetering dangerously close to the holiday season, which means hot, boozy drinks are totally acceptable, or downright encouraged. There’s always the storied eggnog over at Sun Liquor. Or a good hot toddy (just try to avoid heaving one in your companion’s face).

Delve further into the cocktail canon (with a lower-case "C") and you’ll find the Tom and Jerry. It’s a 19th century drink that was once a holiday staple but faded into obscurity about four decades back. Vito’s is resurrecting this eggnoglike concoction and will be serving it from the day after Thanksgiving through New Year’s Eve. Bar manager Justin Gerardy says inspiration struck when a bunch of Tom and Jerry mugs were recently unearthed in the restaurant’s basement.

Tom and Jerry mugs, for the record, usually look something like this (and not at all like this).

The version Gerardy is serving at Vito’s uses a batter made by whipping egg whites and egg yolks separately, and folding them back together with cinnamon, allspice and cloves. Oh, and a bit of Smith and Cross Jamaica rum. He adds steamed milk, more rum (Appleton Estate this time) and a bit of rye whiskey. The result, says Gerardy, is garnished with a bit of nutmeg and has the consistency of a properly made cappuccino. He promises the result is “goddamned delicious.”

I didn’t utter any profanity when I sampled the vin brule at Mike Easton’s pasta spot Il Corvo at lunch today (hey, he’s only open at lunch…I went in the name of research). But it was still mighty enjoyable. Vin brule is the Italian term for mulled wine, also known as gluhwein or glogg. Easton’s an aperitivo and digestif guy, so he livens up his vin brule with a splash of Cocchi Americano, an Italian aperitif. And if you order one from him, you should follow suit.

Add a Comment »

Tags: Vito's, Holiday Drinking, Justin Gerardy, Il Corvo, Mike Easton