Minced Meat Words

Seattle comedian Andy Haynes on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, September 8, 2010

Courtesy Dana Edelson/NBC

“I GET CALLED gay a lot. I’ve been getting called gay my whole life. I was raised by my mom and was a really effeminate kid, and in the fifth grade I was really into figure skating. So I’m used to it. But this guy called me gay the other day. He called me gay because I’m a vegetarian. Yeah, he was like, “You don’t eat meat? Queer!” I was like, How mad is he going to be when he finds out what gay dudes are really doing? It’s not vegetables, bro.”